


You're Home To Me

by dyobaek



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-30
Updated: 2017-09-30
Packaged: 2019-01-07 04:42:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12225984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dyobaek/pseuds/dyobaek
Summary: “Do Kyung Soo. How did you get here? Did you drive? Where is your car?”“Would you care,” he slurred. “If I drove?”She was incredulous.He looked at her. “I asked the driver to… bring me home. And here I am.”“He should have taken you to your house.”“Byun Baekhyun is my house.”





	You're Home To Me

 

_We have to talk. No. Instead,_ **_you_ ** _listen to me. Listen to me well. In the past months… how many times have we seen each other, Kyung Soo? Once, twice. When I call, you’re busy. And you, when you call, I’m too angry to answer._

**How can you expect me to calmly listen to this, Byun Baekhyun? You sound like you’re breaking up with me. Just because we’re busy? We’re at the peak of our careers. We both knew it would be like this.**

_How long has it been since we’ve gone out — just the two of us — like old times? A date because we are a couple and not because we need the company to an event. When was the last time you even touched me? I can’t even remember what your hands feel like._

**And why haven’t** **_you_ ** **procured me? Why do I always have to go to you? Why do I always have to be the one who seeks you? Do you miss me? Want me? Show it to me. Come to me. Make me forget what I’m doing. You know you have that power over me.**

_Are we even a couple? Is there even love anymore? I don’t feel anything in my heart but disappointment. This is why I’m breaking up with you. I can’t do this anymore._

  
**You even doubt my feelings? Have yours grown cold? Must I always be doing something to make you feel my heart? What did we live all this time if not love,** **Baekhyun? Do you think I was playing with you? Were you playing with me then?**

_I can’t become a part of your world. I tried. You know I did. But your world is so cold, and lonely. I don’t want to come home to an empty house. I don’t want to sleep in an empty bed. What are we? Where are we going? I don’t even know that._

**If you think about the consequences you can’t do anything.**

_Let’s go our own ways while we still have more good memories than bad ones. While our feelings are not hateful. Let’s end this way,_ _Kyung Soo_ _. Give me the keys… and don’t come back. Don’t look for me, don’t acknowledge me. Let’s pretend we were a good dream for each other._  
  
**A good dream? Do you think this is a story you’re writing? I’m not giving you the keys. If you want to keep me out, change the lock. Ya! Where are you going? Are you really walking away right now? Has this even been a conversation? Byun** **Baekhyun** **! Baekhyun!**

_Don’t do this,_ _Kyung Soo_ _. You were never the type to do this. Please don’t start now. I want to remember you with a smile on my face._

**Leave with a smile on your face then. Just know you’ve taken mine with you, Baekhyun.**

 

> \------

 

The neon lights flashed in dizzying, rhythmic patterns as bodies swayed on the dance floor to the deafening music that blasted through the speakers. The bass vibrated through KyungSoo’s chest. He frowned and looked at his cellphone. No missed calls. No texts. He threw it on the table feeling annoyed with himself for having expected anything. He sat in the VIP area, on the second level which overlooked the club below. He watched the crowd with disinterest.

 

At the end of the half circle booth was Jong Dae with two prettily adorned girls hanging on his arms. They whispered coyly at him, tugging the zipper of his leather jacket in a fit of giggles. Jong Dae looked at them as if they were the cutest girls he had ever seen. Perhaps in that moment, they were. His friend was always like this. Living in the moment, not worrying about consequences, and in blissful oblivion of the world around. One of the girls dipped her hand inside his pants. Jong Dae bit her ear playfully. The other pouted in jealousy.  
  
Kyung Soo rolled his eyes.  
  
The third girl in their party — an edgier, darker rendition of the colorful fairies swooning over Jong Dae — stole glances at Kyung Soo. She was pretty, in the way most girls could be pretty when they were expertly made up. It was obvious she was trying to go for mysterious but Kyung Soo knew better. He had seen enough women pass through his father to estimate her real type. She scooted closer to reach for the bottle of champagne even though her flute was full. Surprisingly, she served him openly, causing him to look at her directly.  
  
Her crimson lips parted into a satisfied smile. She tapped her glass against his and brought it to her lips. She parted her mouth with deliberate sensuality, letting him see the diamond of her tongue ring. After a modest sip, she licked the rim of the glass, giving him a wink.

 

“You’re quiet tonight oppa,” she purred. The girl had the audacity to pull him closer by his tie. “There is something else our lips can do if talking isn’t on your mind.”

Kyung Soo lifted a brow and snatched his tie from her manicured claws. He loosened it from his neck and threw it at her.

“If you like it so much you should have said so. Were you trying to choke me just now?”  
  
She gave him a baffled look. “He told me you were difficult but this…”  
  
“Difficult?” Kyung Soo chuckled and tilted his head to the side. “For a woman like you I am downright impossible.”  
  
“A woman like me?” Her nose flared. “What is a woman like me?”  
  
Kyung Soo smiled at her and leaned closer. She wore a nauseatingly sweet perfume — some flowery fruit mixture — which made him scrunch his nose. “A woman who wears expensive things to cover up how cheap she is. How much of what you’re wearing was bought by your previous victims? All of it, I’d gamble.”  
  
She shoved him away.  
  
“This oppa will leave you with parting advice.” He licked the edge of his lip. “Unless you’re trying to attract bees you should choose a different perfume.”

“You’re a bastard.”  
  
Before the girl could throw her glass of champagne at his face, Kyung Soo dumped what was left of the bottle over her head. She screamed curses at him while trying to dry her dress with tiny cocktail napkins.

"Do Kyung Soo!" Jong Dae shook his head. He quickly leaned over to take away the glasses of champagne which the girl was ready to throw at his face. "You girls caught him on a bad night. He isn’t usually like this."  
  
The offended girl bit her lip furiously and turned to Kyung Soo. “I will remember your name.”  
  
"Most people do." Kyung Soo shrugged. "You should be thanking me. At least now you have the scent of very expensive champagne."

“You will regret this!”  
  
Kyung Soo waved her away. There were very few things in life he regretted; making her smell better wasn’t one of them.

The girl shoved past Jong Dae and left with her little clique. His friend sighed defeated and shot a glare at him. “You bastard. You scared my fun away.”  
  
"Here I am with a broken heart and all you care about is filling your bed? Shouldn’t you be consoling me right now, oh?"

“If you can make jokes you’re doing well enough.”  
  
Kyung Soo gave him a look. “And here I thought you knew me well, Jong Dae. I’m so disappointed that I could cry.”

"Ya! I dragged you out tonight so we could have some hot fun." Jong Dae slid over to him. "You said you would let her go. And move on."

Kyung Soo closed his eyes. “You brought me the wrong girl for that.”  
  
“And who is the right girl? Byun Baekhyun?” Jong Dae punched his shoulder. “Forget it! She broke up with you. She even shipped your stuff to my studio. She wants to avoid you _that_ badly.”  
  
"I told you to mail it back to her."  
  
"I’m not playing your childish games for you!"  
  
"You’re a horrible friend, Jong Dae. Remind me to blacklist you from SM. No more free suites for your rendezvous."  
  
"It’s obviously end game now, Kyung Soo! You were always world’s apart. Get this through your head!"

Kyung Soo cringed. He hated that phrase: world’s apart. When both Byun Baekhyun and him were part of the same planet, breathing the same air and rising under the same sun — what was being world’s apart? Kyung Soo curled his fingers around the glass which the girl had served him and gulped down the golden liquid in one go. It didn’t even burn his throat.

“Kyung Soo,” Jong Dae began.

It hurt to be called that way because it reminded him of Baekhyun. Because his friend had spoken softly, considerately, just like she had when she broke his heart in half. Such ugly words had been spoken by her pretty lips. Lips which he had kissed more times than he could count. He could still taste her and feel her beneath his fingertips. The softness of her skin, the curves of her body which fit perfectly with his. The memories were cruelly vivid leaving him with an aching hole in his heart.  
  
"I was going to propose to her." Kyung Soo sighed. "That very day."  
  
Jong Dae’s eyes widened. “Ya. You crazy bastard. Are you serious?”

Baekhyun had turned her back on him as though she hadn’t just ended a relationship of  _years_ with him. As if their romance had been fleeting and inconsequential. Baekhyun left as though the memories were easy to carry. Her steps never faltered and she did not turn even once to see him. Not even when he called her name or when he’d caught her arm.

How long he had stood there, staring at the direction to which she had disappeared, Kyung Soo didn’t know. When his mother hadn’t waited for him, when she never came back for him, his soul had been shattered. The feelings of abandonment, of helplessness, those were scars he carried on his heart. Baekhyun, however, was like a cut that never closed or ceased to bleed. Even though he brought himself through the motions of everyday life, though he could still be considered Do Kyung Soo to all who looked upon him, the truth was that he was becoming weaker. Blood was indispensable, after all.

“Letting go. I thought I was good at that.”

Jong Dae shook a finger at him. “You let go but you don’t forget. Tonight you’re going to try my way of forgetting.”

/ / / / / / /

Baekhyun stared at the screen, her finger hovering over the enter key. It was the last line she would make before she typed “the end.” Finally, after all those long, suffering months she would be able to part with her beloved characters and imagine them living happily beyond the confines of her book. She should be elated but instead she felt sad. Why were endings so painful?

 

Baekhyun took a deep breath and tapped the key. Finally, with shaking hands, she put the parting words. It was done. And now she felt very empty again.

_It’s always the same feeling._

Baekhyun opened the drawer of her desk and pulled out the first manuscript she had ever written. It had been during College. Inspired by Kyung Soo like much of her work was. Even if just a small detail of him, Baekhyun always threaded him in her stories. His eyes, his voice, perhaps the way he looked at her when they ate together. The smile he only showed her or the way he sometimes talked in his sleep. Those tiny details about him which were impossible to forget no matter how much she tried — those were immortalized in her works. Because it had always been him who moved her heart to feel extreme emotions, and those emotions sparked ideas. Kyung Soo was her muse, even if she would never admit it to him.

Baekhyun stretched feeling her back muscles knotted. When she looked at the clock, she yelped. It was one past midnight. She hurried to the kitchen. She hadn’t taken out the trash in a couple of days. She’d been too busy writing. Usually Kyung Soo was the one to carry it out for her because he said he was a better fighter than her, should someone try for an ambush to get her discarded manuscripts. She had become quite a respectable author and he always reminded her of it.

_He’s gone now. So you have to make a habit to do this earlier._

She gathered the bags at the door and began putting on her shoes. It was precisely then when a text message came in. It was her mother.

[Did you fall asleep at the desk again? Don’t you consider me who waits for your text every night as you asked me to?]

She hadn’t told her mother the details about her breakup from Kyung Soo. Baekhyun had merely told her that she should not call him anymore — that they should both let him go. Her mother hadn’t asked. She had shown her disappointment and even hit her every time she remembered she’d lost her “son” but she wouldn’t press for reasons. It was too soon and Baekhyun could barely say his name without feeling shredded inside.

(I finished the novel tonight.)  
  
[Is it a happy story this time?]

(It’s an open end.)

[Why do you always write sad stories?]

 _Is that what I do?_  
  
(I was going to take out the trash now.)

[It’s very cold. Put on a good jacket.]

(The trash is right outside.)  
  
[Come back in fast. Don’t go walking. It’s too late for that.]

(I won’t mom. I’ll text you when I’m in bed.)

[Don’t bother. I’m going to sleep now.]

Baekhyun smiled a little.  
  
She took a heavy jacket from the coat closet and put it on quickly. The night was cold. Winter was moving in quickly and with it came many memories. Baekhyun shivered as she walked down the street toward the alley. She could hear the cars honking beyond in the noisy city. Was he out there? Was he driving? Was he working at his office? Or had he fallen asleep at his desk as she often did?

Baekhyun lifted the heavy bags and dumped them in the trash bin. She rubbed her hands together and turned. Kyung Soo was there, wobbling from side to side. He wore a strange smile on his face.

_Am I imagining him there?_

The light of the street lamp flickered.

“Good evening…” He bowed to her. “Byun. Baekhyun”

“Are you drunk?”

He pinched the air between his thumb and forefinger, his smile wide. He was so flushed that he looked feverish. “Little bit. Just a little bit.”  
  
Baekhyun looked up and down the street. She didn’t see his car. Or his driver. Or anyone.

“Do Kyung Soo. How did you get here? Did you drive? Where is your car?”  
  
“Would you care,” he slurred. “If I drove?”  
  
She was incredulous.

He looked at her. “I asked the driver to… bring me home. And here I am.”  
  
“He should have taken you to _your_ house.”  
  
“Byun Baekhyun is my house.”

If it was so cold for you. If it bothered you to this extent. Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you let me think we understood each other? What are we? I’ve tried to define our relationship from the start. You are the one who has never taken my words seriously. Even though I’ve meant every word I said, to you, were they a joke?

She fumbled for her phone. “I’m calling Jong Dae. He can pick up.”

“Ya!” He staggered forward and snatched her phone. “When I don’t come to you… it’s bad. When I come to you… you want me to leave.”  
  
“Give me back my phone.”  
  
He lifted himself to his full height for a moment before dizziness made him stoop again. “Come take it from me.”  
  
“Are you really doing this?” She sighed. “You don’t need to come to me anymore. We’re—”  
  
“You taught me how to make you come to me, Byun Baekhyun… without threats.” His grabbed at his own collar in frustration. “Teach me then. How to let go. Letting people come… letting people go… I don’t know about these things.”

  
She bit her tongue.  
  
“Why am I here?” He looked around. “I just wanted to… go home. And I end here. How could you make me a homeless bastard?”  
  
“This isn’t like you.” She shook her head. “You don’t get drunk like this. Why do you behave so badly when I’m not around?”  
  
He touched her cheek. “Our baek,” he sang horribly. “Our baek is so pretty. When did you become so pretty?”  
  
"You’re even singing now? Do you want them to call the police?"  
  
His face twisted with emotion. He stumbled forward but caught himself on her shoulders. He lifted a hand, pointed at her, and tried to form words but they would not come out. Baekhyun had never seen him look like this — so torn and devastated. Not when his mother had stepped back into his life or when his father had gone to jail. Not even when she had said she couldn’t be with him anymore had he looked as broken as he did then.  
  
“Baekhyun,” he whispered. “Baekhyun.”  
  
She couldn’t breathe.  
  
It had been so hard to walk away from him that day. To not look back, to not run back. Removing him from her life had been so painful. They had taken so many pictures. Lived so many memories. She hadn’t realized how much of his wardrobe he’d brought to her apartment until she had to pack his belongings in three suitcases. His cologne still permeated everything she owned.

“You shouldn’t be here.”  
  
But he was. Right in front of her. With his hair disheveled. His clothes wrinkled. Trembling.  
  
“It’s too cold.”  
  
He took a sharp intake of breath. “It’s always cold… now.”  
  
“Don’t do this to me.”  
  
“You gave me warmth.”  
  
“Kyung Soo.”  
  
“Don’t call my name like that.” He pressed his lips tightly. “I don’t know what I’ll do. If you call me like that. Makes me want to kiss you…”  
  
“You’re going to catch pneumonia like this.”  
  
“Then let me in…”

Baekhyun felt the sting of tears. The request had so much weight, so much meaning. She could see it in his eyes — what he truly meant. What he really wanted. This stubborn, fierce man who always walked with confidence was stumbling toward her like a child. She stretched her hand to him.

For a moment he looked at is as though he wasn’t sure he was seeing it. As if he couldn’t quite make out what was in front of him.  
  
“Let’s go inside.”

/ / / / / / /

Kyung Soo felt his heart beat crazily fast in his chest. She had fallen for the whole thing. Kyung Soo had seen Jong Dae drunk enough times to properly duplicate the mannerisms of one who had drowned his sorrows with alcohol. He had even pinched his cheeks until they stung to get them colored appropriately. When Baekhyun wrapped an arm around his waist, he stumbled here and there for effect.

She was reprimanding him for drinking and being irresponsible but he was hardly paying heed to her words. His eyes were fixated on her cherry lips and the way they parted with each syllable. He really wanted to kiss her, to hold her, to make love to her.  
  
"If mom saw you like this she’d be so disappointed."  
  
She let him into the apartment and shut the door with a shove of her hips. He kicked off his shoes and broke away from her. He weaved his way though the furniture toward her bedroom.  
  
"Ya!" She hissed. "Where are you going?"

“Shower.”

“Can you even stand?”  
  
He swung around and leaned on the wall for support. He’d only had a few shots with Jong Dae because he needed some alcohol on his breath to be truly convincing.

“Want to help me shower?”

She narrowed her eyes at him. Kyung Soo rolled his eyes as if a dizzy spell had come over him. He lurched forward and held his stomach. It was enough to get her to say, “Go throw up in the bathroom.”  
  
He turned around and smiled, disappearing into the bedroom before she could regret the offer. In the bathroom he looked at himself in the mirror. He totally looked wasted. Kyung Soo sniffed his shirt. He also smelled wasted. He took a deep breath and exhaled.

“Ya!” He shouted. “I can’t take it off!”  
  
“Take what off?”  
  
He looked down at himself. “My shirt.”  
  
He heard her footsteps and grumbling. Quickly, he leaned against the sink and slouched, tugging on his shirt impatiently. Baekhyun slipped inside the bathroom and stood in front of him. She started with the top buttons.  
  
“There is nothing left of yours to wear—”

Baekhyun had pulled her hair in a bun held together by a pair of pencils.  
  
“—because I sent it all to—”  
  
She had also shed her coat, and sweater, revealing a loose white shirt. He could see the curve of her collarbones.  
  
“—Jong Dae. Did he take it to you?”  
  
She undid the last button and looked up at him. And he saw it there — in her eyes — that she wasn’t indifferent to him. That every single button had made her increasingly aware of his proximity. Those hurtful words she had hurled at him were empty. She did care. She did _feel_. She still wanted him. He couldn’t help the curl of his lips. Baekhyun looked like a lamb caught in the jaws of a vicious wolf.  
  
"Ya!" She raised a warning finger at him. "Don’t even dare."  
  
Whatever resolve she had mustered in order to leave him slipped away as easily as he shrugged off his shirt. He discarded his belt next, his eyes never moving away from Baekhyun’s. Kyung Soo pulled the pencils from her hair and watched with fascination as it cascaded down her shoulders. Everything about her excited him — made him crazy. It had always been like that, from the beginning.  
  
Baekhyun moved away from him. He cornered her into the shower and pressed her against the cold tile. She gasped. Kyung Soo dipped his head and kissed her. She pushed at his chest but he didn’t relent. He wanted her to remember everything she claimed she had forgotten.

**I’m going to burn you.**

Baekhyun shoved him against the other end of the shower and turned on the spray. Kyung Soo pulled her under with him and kissed her again. They shivered as the cold water soaked them. His hands slipped underneath her shirt to feel the smoothness of her skin. She clung to his shoulders and breathed his name into his mouth with startling urgency.

“You know what happens when you say my name like that,” he groaned into her ear. “I’m going to take revenge on you tonight.”  
  
“You’re not drunk.”  
  
He pulled away to look at her. “You should have known better.”  
  
She glared at him. “You’re a bad guy.”  
  
“You always knew I was."

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I have post fic in AA before this. Don't forget to leave a comment and let me know what you feels. Enjoy!


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